Oh God, get me out of here!” Have you ever chanted that prayer? I know I have. The urge to run is powerful. It’s instinctual. It can be an intuitive warning that danger is hovering; however, this type of intuitive alert is not what I’m talking about today.
The urge to run can be a default that you’ve set up in your life. It grabs your attention when life breaks the barriers of your self-defined sense of control.
Do you run? Do you freeze? Do you fight?
As the saying goes, “When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” However, the saying I’m talking about isn’t well known; however, it’s commonly felt.
Does this feel familiar? “When the sensitive in me gets emotionally torqued … RUN!” These slogans have similar themes, but the intentions are miles apart.
One of the things I know about myself is that I can dig in anywhere and get through whatever is happening. I can choose to lift my energy up, to listen to my wisdom, and to stay until I have completed the journey at hand – long or short. I am one determined chick.
It’s my other birthday today. February 5th is the day I died. For eleven days prior to that event, I lie in a hospital bed with spinal meningitis and brain abscesses; although, the doctors didn’t know that at the time. My diagnosis was the flu or potentially pregnancy. Really? My eyes were extending from their sockets from the cranial pressure and I felt like a semi had parked its gigantic tandem wheels on my head.
I had nowhere to run. I was dying. I had to stay. I had to be with what was. I was forced past my fear and into a state of being present. Trust me, I didn’t go willingly. Yet, all I could do was to exist one second at a time. Breathing … finally recognizing that the only thing I was in charge of was how I responded emotionally. The only thing left for me was to yield to the experiences presented.
Life is always our most poignant and accurate teacher. It is often swift with exacting precision. I learned that there is such a thing as the art of staying. However, I haven’t been always good at staying – it’s a work in progress.
Yes, I’ve been a runner and a freezer. (Picture the Tin Man from the Wizard of Oz high-tailing it out of the enchanted forest with the flying monkeys hot on his clanking stiff-legged can.) That would have been me.
How did I stop running and freezing? I practiced, then and to this day, the art of staying. I learned that even though I might be aching to run or freeze, the wisdom that would change my situation, life, and the current moment of pain was right here. No place, person, or thing can save me or change the situation. It’s up to me to create my life, in this moment.
As a result, part of me has turned into a loyal unconditionally-loving golden retriever and I’ve learned to stay. I stay with the hurting part of myself and compassionately comfort her.
When you freeze, it can feel like total confusion and your brain is scrambled. When that occurs it means that life has gotten too much for your body and your nervous system. Your gorgeous mind is a bit fragmented. Your energy scatters like buckshot. And, in the moment, you’ve lost the connection to your precious soul.
Inhale… Exhale… Be generous with yourself and understand that whatever emotion you are feeling is the outer expression of some very deep wisdom. If you can stay, and sit with that feeling, you’ll hear its truer voice. The wisdom will then sweep over you and soak into your aching heart. That soul-inspired work-in-progress mode will set you free.
Catch yourself when you’ve lost your grounding and crawl to your yoga mat, or go for a walk. Do something physical, instead of crawling under the covers. Although, I guess they call a bedspread a comforter.
Applying sincere kindness to the situation or your emotions will keep you from running, freezing, or fighting. After all, when you rear back and try to take a swing at life, you’ll end up catching a nothing but air. Live your life’s moments, fully.
Life is miraculous. I am a walking example of such. So, too, are you.
Life’s fluid changes can be difficult though. There are moments we would rather not experience. We lose a loved one. The job didn’t work. The relationship busted or your wallet busted too. With all of our affirmations and positivity, it’s still a tough road sometimes. That’s where using your spiritual tools, and staying awake and conscious comes into play.
The work of your soul is truly the hero’s journey home – it’s your SoulWork.
Your SoulWork Suggestion today is: stay. Stay with your soul when things get tough. Use your powerful mind, your intuition, and soulful heart and sit with whatever it is you’re feeling. Be kind to yourself. Life does get sloppy and there you go. It’s sloppy. That doesn’t mean you can’t handle it. Staying does not mean keep to yourself in harm’s way or in a hurtful relationship. Staying, in this context, is about being kind and curious as to why you want to run.
When the tough get going, they don’t run; they get going on the journey inside and linger with their anger, frustration, and upsetness. It is the place from which they gather clarity and strength. They learn how to be compassionate and forgiving to themselves, and get clear on what’s happening. And so can you.
Don’t run from life. If there is any running to do, run toward your life. If you run away, you’ll leave the good work and miracles behind and keep on using the same default over and over, and over … and over again. Wonder why you can’t manifest the life of your dreams? Perhaps part of you is running from what is. Choose to stay and be curious regarding the emotions that flip this trigger, urging you to leave your life in the dust.
Trust yourself. Trust your intuition. When you do, miracles will follow.
When you seek, your soul responds. Then, you can creatively resolve whatever it is that is churning in your heart and belly.
Everything moves and shifts. The wisdom to be present and to live a miraculous life is at your fingertips. Try these seven simple steps next time you want to run, freeze, or take a swing at life:
SoulWork is the most powerful creative endeavor you’ll experience. It allows you to create your life as a work of art, with your soul leading the way. There is no greater beauty than living life from that place. You are an amazing bright light in the world. Turn it on and stay a while.